Today we've got one new thing (DHS updates), some things not really new but new to me (Pirates Dinner Universal VIP Tour and a look at Orlando Fun Tickets), and a few things revisited (Disaster ride, Uni's Meal Deal). There's something for everyone!

Just reopened this week is Playhouse Disney, which previously starred Bear in the Big Blue House, Stanley, JoJo's Circus, and a segment on the Book of Pooh. The Pooh show around now, My Friends Tigger and Pooh (starring Darby, a girl, rather than Christopher Robin) has a presence in the new Playhouse Disney show, so there's a touch of continuity there.

The show is updated to reflect today's Playhouse Disney lineup, so gone are Bear, Stanley, and JoJo. In its place are the Fab Five, a great idea that should have been there to start with. Mickey and Gang want to put on a birthday surprise for Minnie, and they have a problem about what to do. They call up Toodles, who has three Mousekatools in the form of stories from Playhouse Disney shows: Handy Manny, Little Einsteins, and My Friends Tigger and Pooh. The connections are tenuous; Goofy is the one who "needed" Little Einsteins, and he learned that the way to bake a cake is to find a friend to cheer him on. Shrug.

The point is, the new shows have their due. Handy Manny and his tools have to repair a washing machine, during which they release bubbles into the audience (a much more natural integration of the bubble maker into the show than was the case previously).

The Little Einsteins win a race against Big Jet, with the audience clapping along to reach the superfast speed of "presto", of course (only those who watch the show will understand that sentence).

And the gang dislodges a kite in the Pooh segment by blowing at it, which also releases innumerable leaves into the audience.

There are familiar songs all over the place, of course, but somehow the interaction and the dancing seem less frequent. And I can't put my finger on it, but the energy was a bit less than the previous incarnation of this show, as outdated as it was. That leaves me feeling ambivalent. It's nice to have it new, it's nice to be updated, but it was also better when there was a lot of high energy and dancing, and now there's less of it.

Disney has finally announced what is to come in the former ABC Theater at DHS: a theme park version of American Idol. I'm half intrigued by, and half leery of, the idea.

It occurs to me that American Idol was blistering hot a few years ago, but now, not so much. Is the show past its prime? Probably not in the way that Who Wants to be a Millionaire was, by the end. In that case, Disney killed the golden goose by playing the show five days a week, something that hasn't happened yet to Idol. But it would be par for the course for Disney to introduce something after it has peaked.

Moreover, I'm wondering how exactly this is going to work. Will they really get enough talent in one day? Do people visiting a theme park really want to hold themselves up for this kind of exhibitionism, without alcohol? (Karaoke is different, it's night, people are drunk, and they often have just their friends as audience). I know that DHS serves the odd beer or two, but this is no bar.

Beyond that, the Idol formula works so well because it's a train wreck, and people are dying to know which of the judges are going to be mean (OK, they are really dying to hear Simon say something pithy). But I can't see them doing that at DHS. Reduce your volunteer performer to tears? Not going to happen.

Ergo, they will be nice. Or perhaps bland, which is worse, since it's uninteresting. Will there be voting? Will the audience vote?

I suppose, in the end analysis, we'll just have to wait to see how they do it. In one sense, literally anything is better than an empty theater. I abhor a Disney theme park vacuum, if you'll allow the metaphor.

This weekend, Kilimanjaro Safaris had a rather severe fire caused by an oil leak on one of the attraction's custom-built, 29-foot long GMC trucks. Oil leaked out of the truck's lubrication system while it was passing between Ituri Forest, where the storks are seen, into Sophi River, home to the hippopotamus. Upon igniting, a large section of the road became engulfed in flames and many people began jumping out of the truck. Fire trucks and paramedics were dispatched to the area to put out the fire, treating at least one person with moderate to severe burns, though many injuries are believed to have been caused by the smoke rather than the fire itself. It is believed that others were treated for sprained ankles and other such injuries after jumping from the truck.

Once the fire was put out and the guests and truck were cleared from the area, other trucks were allowed to pass through to utilize an emergency ride path exited located in the area of the fire. Drivers that had to evacuate this way said that the smell of the oil was intense and that on the road an oil slick remained following the accident. Animal Services members were on hand early to be sure none of the animals from either side made it into the area. Luckily, the stretch of ride path on which the incident occurred is not inhabited by animals.

On Friday evening, I caught the second performance of Pirates Dinner Adventure, a dinner-theater experience right next to International Drive (near Sand Lake). I don't come from a background steeped in dinner theater; I'd seen a few smaller productions in hotels, and then Medieval Times and Arabian Nights. How does this one compare? In a nutshell, it's better than Arabian Nights but more discombobulated than Medieval Times.

Certainly it's more exciting than Arabian Nights, where the glacial pace is meant to convey the majesty of the horses. The pirate show features only human actors, crawling, swinging, and cavorting overhead like frenzied monkeys. There's a lot of action and a lot of excitement. Actually, this is a drawback at the same time. There is too MUCH action and plot. Every time I looked down at my plate to spear a potato with my fork, by the time I looked up again the scene had changed, different actors were on the stage, and I was bewildered by the new challenge going on. The pirates were forever engaged in contests of sorts, but I had no clue what for or who was winning. There was a Captain Black villain, and all of the other pirates vied somehow to defeat or replace him? The other pirates were organized by color. We sat in the corner for the Orange Pirate, and had to cheer for him whenever he tried to win a contest.

The action was not just fast, it was close, almost overhead. And there was lots and lots of audience involvement. Kids were hauled on stage, people from the audience got to toss things at our pirates, and trains of audience members were pressed into service on the ship/stage.

The food was miles ahead of the standard fare at Arabian Nights (and better than my decades-old memory of Medieval Times too). I'd go so far as to say the food was succulent. The chicken was excellent, the pork even better, and the shrimp outstanding. The potatoes and vegetables were great, too, and usually those are dishes left alone to be merely "acceptable." Kudos to the chef.

The Purple Pirate was a gymnast, and he did some truly amazing things on the trampoline. The show felt a bit like the Festival of the Lion King at DAK on a few occasions, and this was one of them, but the athleticism here outstripped the Lion King show. Of course, the songs and tunes resonate much better at the Lion King show, since the audience already knows those songs.

There were negatives to the event also. In addition to the overabundance of plot mentioned earlier, the show suffers from the script being prescribed. The blue pirate will ALWAYS win, and that dramatically limits my interest in coming back. And the bewildering plot is important beyond even the logic of the story. If the audience cannot follow what's going on, it's hard to care about the characters. It doesn't help matters when the comment cards come before the climax of the show. If you spend time filling out a card, guess what? You miss more crucial plot.

At the start of the show, as we were seating, the Orange Pirate boomed at us that we had one job: get drunk! He wanted to establish a rowdy mood. Too bad that the beer glasses were not filled two at a time, or that pitchers of beer were not left on the table. Instead, we had one glass to work with. It's hard to "get drunk" when they bring you one beer to start with, and don't return to offer refills until dessert, which is a full hour later. Yes, alcohol (if you can call Miller High Life "alcohol") is included, but don't plan to get drunk.

Beer is not included in the preshow area, though. There's a bar, all right, but expect to pay more than you ever have in life for a beer. I paid $7 for a simple bottle of Michelob Ultra.

Souvenirs were expensive. We paid $14 for a plastic sword that has a couple of flashing colored lights when a button is depressed, and a sound effect goes off. Kids may not be the ideal audience anyway. There are some loud gun effects in the show, and the late show doesn't even start until 8:30 pm.

There's a VIP ticket offered, with a special VIP section during the preshow, but all that really means is a place to sit down (the others have to stand), and you won't be as close to the energetic preshow happening outside. The free appetizers are only slightly different from the free appetizers that everyone else gets. The VIP price also guarantees interaction in the show if you want that, but we were never asked if we wanted that, and we didn't interact. For that matter, we were never photographed, though we saw other people had been photographed and were offered photos for sale on the spot (a practice I hate anyway). Verdict: the VIP add-on is definitely not worth any price.

Speaking of price, it's about $56 per adult for the evening. Is it worth it? That's very hard to say. Pressed to make a decision, I'd probably say "not for most people." I'm trying to decide a metric here. It's almost the price of an entire day of admission to a theme park, clearly a better deal. It's half the price of Victoria & Albert's, and by golly, I'd rather go to V&A than go to Pirates twice; no hesitation at all in that decision! It may be telling that the theater was only 1/3 full on our show (out of a capacity of perhaps 800 people), the 8:30 show on a Friday night. It was a $20 meal, roughly, so I'd feel very comfortable about a $30 ticket, or even a $35 ticket. But $56 really pushes the envelope.

There's no visible progress at the Simpsons ride, but recent intelligence has confirmed we can expect the same Omnimax screen and numerous ride vehicles (though rumors persist an extra row may be added). We also know that the show film will take us to Krustyland at some point. Beyond that, everything is secretive.

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© 2008 Kevin Yee